I remember one day sitting with a group of young Swiss parents. We were having a pleasant dinner when the conversation shifted to the topic of kindergarten.

One man, we'll call him Patrick, was visibly upset and said, “I went to my daughter's class, and half of the kids didn’t even speak German, let alone Swiss German.”

A woman, Petra, chimed in, “Yup, same thing in my son’s school. I don’t get it. You live in a country; you could at least try to integrate your kids.”

Patrick added, “Even the teacher had to remind them that it's their responsibility to teach the local language to their children, because she has so many kids to care for.”

Petra shook her head and said, “That’s so selfish of the parents.”

As a new bilingual mom, it was incredibly challenging to hear such harsh criticism from parents who had no understanding of the difficulties of passing down one's culture to a child while living abroad and trying to integrate into a new society. They spoke as if they fully understood the heartache of witnessing their own child struggling to communicate with grandparents or feeling a connection to their country of origin. What they failed to consider was that not every family could afford to send their kids to a local daycare to be exposed to the language, and perhaps the parents' knowledge of Swiss German was so limited that there wasn't much they could teach their children in the first place. The sheer level of ignorance on this matter left me utterly astounded.

However, as I listened, I realized the need to set aside my emotions and understand the root of their concerns. Weren't they just worried parents, wanting the best for their children, like most of us? I also recognized the challenge this posed for teachers, especially when they were already dealing with an overwhelming number of children with significant gaps in their language skills.

Leaving that conversation, I was left with more questions than answers. What would have been the best course of action in this situation?

I firmly believe that parents should never be pressured into abandoning their native language when communicating with their child, whether it's for the sake of integration or otherwise. In fact, I see it as their duty to preserve their culture.

At the same time, I empathize with the fears of other parents.

So my question to you is: Is it fair for Swiss children to potentially fall behind because some of their classmates don't have the same language proficiency? What could be a solution that benefits both parties? 

I invite you to share your thoughts and suggestions in the comments below.